I have two niggly little problems: relating to life and
relating to people. I’ve had lots of practice, but I still can’t seem to get
the hang of it all. I suppose the way to get over it is not to take either life
or people seriously – or myself, come to that. And very often I don’t.
But then it gets late in the day (or early in the morning,
to be precise.) I have a couple of drinks and these little imps start
appearing. Sometimes they come singly, and sometimes in groups. Sometimes the
members of the group work together to reinforce the point they’re trying to
make, and sometimes they compete to confuse me. But the words they always finish with are ‘take this seriously, it matters.’
And so I do, and then I become troubled or excited or
depressed or something. At that point I often engage in troublesome
communications with people who are important to me. I say things because they
seem like the right thing to say, only to look back on them the next morning
and wish I hadn’t. So I consider apologising, but usually don’t. Instead, I
take the view that it’s only life so what the hell – and the person I wrote to
probably doesn’t give a monkey’s toss about me or my stupid message anyway. And
then I go about the day and try to find something to be interested in.
I sometimes wonder how I manage to have an IQ of 157
(allegedly) and still end up being so pointless.
Off for a walk now. Maybe I’ll find something to be
interested in.
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