Monday 23 January 2012

The Odds are Against Understanding.

Somebody asked me recently ‘are you a jealous person?’ My first inclination was to reply ‘very.’ Somebody else once said to me ‘it’s only jealousy.’ My response to that was ‘what the hell do you mean, only!

During the turbulent course of self-examination that’s been going on over the last year or so, my ‘jealousy’ has been the subject of much in-depth consideration. It’s caused more difficulty and misunderstanding than any other factor, and it’s probably been the only thing I’ve never come close to rectifying or controlling.

I finally worked out what it’s all about and why it has such a devastating effect on me. What I don’t know is whether any other individual is referring to the same thing when they use the term ‘jealousy.’ It’s become obvious from my discussions with other people that most of them aren’t. And therein lies the problem.

Most words have a universal definition. We all know what a tree is, and we all mean pretty much the same thing when we say ‘I’m cold.’ Words that describe emotion aren’t like that. They cover a broad area of universally recognised experience, but they don’t describe specifics well because each person uses a given word wholly in terms of what it means to them personally. So when somebody says ‘I’m jealous,’ the chances of us understanding exactly what they mean are very slim.

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