Labels and Comestibles.

I’m just drinking the first of these alcohol-free beers I bought by mistake. It tastes like weak soda water flavoured with a little rotting tree bark. The only smidgeon of pleasure I’m deriving from it is the amusement of seeing the obligatory nanny wail on the label:

PLEASE DRINK RESPONSIBLY

… followed by:

Not more than 0.05% ABV

I assume it comes from the same stable as those packs of nuts which are required to inform the unwary that they ‘may contain nuts.’ No doubt the state is trying to avoid being sued for omitting to warn people with nut allergies that cashew nuts are nuts. I suppose it keeps their conscience clear when they’re doing their best to make sure that even people without a brain cell have no excuse for failing in their duty to the free market by not being a rampant consumer. Come to think of it…

I’ve finished the ‘beer.’ The scotch bottle never looked more handsome.

And talking of comestibles, I just came to the conclusion that the invention of the cheese sandwich is one of the few achievements for which the human race can be truly proud.