Intrepid, but Soggy.

Tonight’s Dracula update:

The intrepid vampire hunters have had their first physical encounter with their quarry. It was a draw, more or less. There were no wrecks and nobody drownded, and nobody got bitten. Phew. So, the field having been neither won nor lost, they retired before sunset to Mina’s lodging in Dr Seward’s asylum, there to keep an eye on her during the dangerous hours.

She makes a nice little speech, in which she tells them that they mustn’t hate the Count. They must hunt and destroy him, but they must remember that he is a tortured victim, too, and so they should see their mission as freeing his mortal soul to go to the place where mortal souls are supposed to go. (Warning: I’m afraid there’s an awful lot of God, Jesus and Heaven in this book.)

Mina’s speech is rational, compassionate and tightly written. You begin to warm a little towards Stoker’s writing – until you read the next paragraph. I can only quote it verbatim to make the point.

‘We men were all in tears now (it’s an extract from Dr Seward’s diary.) There was no resisting them, and we wept openly. She wept too, to see that her sweeter counsels had prevailed. Her husband flung himself on his knees beside her, and putting his arms round her, hid his face in the folds of her dress. Van Helsing beckoned to us and we stole out of the room, leaving the two loving hearts alone with their God.’

So what options do you have at this point, apart from laughing your socks off and then vomiting into them?

Jonathan’s hair has turned white by the way, and his knuckles frequently assume the same hue. His face, on the other hand, is more prone to turning black with thunder. I expect his knees must be red from having himself flung on them, but Stoker spares us this detail.