As I was walking past the village pub tonight I fancied a
pint, but I had no money on me so I walked on.
For some reason it reminded me of being fifteen and going on
holiday with my friend Barry. Neither of us had yet developed a drinking habit –
that was to come a few months later in my case – but we both fancied a taste of
beer one night, and so we bought a bottle and shared it while we walked along
the beach in the darkness.
Two older teenage girls came past watching us. One of them
spoke:
‘Have you two drunk that whole bottle of beer? All on your
own? Wow!’
It was the first intimation I had of the predilection for
sarcasm which young women are wont to display towards teenage boys. I suppose it’s a
pre-emptive attempt to establish the dominant psychological position for later
use. And yet, interestingly, they only seem to do it when they have the support
of a group or companion.
* * *
Having paid her close respects to both Jupiter and Venus
over the past three nights, the young but burgeoning moon is now moving off
eastwards into the darker part of the sky. Soon she will take up her position as
unchallenged Queen of the Firmament, before fading with little grace as all
monarchs do. The difference is that she will be back a couple of weeks later to
run the cycle all over again.
* * *
I realised tonight that Abi and I live in completely
different worlds. She lives in a young woman’s world, replete with physical friends
and myriad activities. I, on the other hand, inhabit a sort of twilight zone in
which there is Helen at a distance, my daughter at a greater distance, and a group of ghostly people
scattered around cyberspace who talk to me through the ether.
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