There’s a huge spider in my kitchen. It’s about the
same size as the trogloraptor, as described in the news report I read yesterday.
So now I’m wondering whether the boys at Google have read my previous post and
engaged some fiendish piece of technology, knowledge of which is currently being
withheld from ordinary mortals like me. Maybe it’s their Room 101 device,
capable of transmitting real, flesh and blood spiders through the cabling and
out of the back of my machine, thence to crawl unseen and unsuspected into my
kitchen where they will sit in a challenging pose on both the hot and cold
taps.
Well, if it is, it’s a bit wimpy in my opinion. What
would be much more impressive would be to send a spider 12” wide that would
gradually materialise on my monitor screen, and then crawl slowly out and walk
determinedly across the desk towards me.
So there’s your challenge, Google. Stop busying
yourself with my e-mails and invent something you can be proud of.
2 comments:
Oh no... i could never visit as long as you have a spider in your kitchen. My biggest fear in life is spiders. And i think i can honestly say that... that my greatest fear is spiders. After having Liam my greatest fear for a while was that a spider would get on him and for quiet some time i wouldn't allow him to sleep in his room alone at night after i saw a spider in there one day.
They don't generally bother me, although the very big ones move a bit too fast for comfort. And we have one called the 'jumping spider.' They're not particularly big, but if you touch them they jump so quickly that you don't know where they've gone. And I've heard from a reliable source that they bite and leave a painful swelling, although I've never been bitten by one. I love to watch them weaving their webs, though.
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