Following on from the last post, it struck me that there
might be a trend to be set in alternative Valentine’s Day cards. The standard verses
are always so sweet, sickly and unimaginative, so I wonder whether the
marketing men might like the odd punk version, just for the Essex
girls. Here’s the first one that comes to mind:
Penelope, you ugly
whore
You’re such a trollop,
such a bore
I’d like to get you on
the floor
And squeeze you ’till
you breathe no more
I should add that the reason I chose the name Penelope was
because I’ve never in my whole life known one. And, anyway, it just came to me.
And while I’m on the subject of Essex
girls, this is very funny:
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