The Game of Life?

The notions came flooding in again this morning. I was considering the question of life and whether the nihilists have got it right. This is what occurred to me in that moment of insight, or madness, or self-delusion, or whatever it was.

Life is just a game that we play because we want to, because there’s fun to be had. It’s like going out onto a rugby pitch knowing the potential for thrills and disappointments, for successes and failures, for grinding effort interspersed with rest periods. We do it over and over again, knowing that in one game we might score three tries and be the hero of the hour, while in another we might get carried off in the first minute with broken bones and suffer great pain.

And each time we don the shirt, shorts, socks, boots and various items of protective equipment, we forget what has gone before. The real ‘we’ consciously shuts out the world beyond the pitch so we can better engage with the game. And we continue to do so because life has the capacity to provide thrills and spills way beyond what any sport can offer. There are dimensions ranging from the physical to the mental to the emotional to the spiritual. Life’s demons are so much more destructive, and its angels infinitely more sublime.

Eventually, however, the process of forgetting becomes more difficult. Conscious memory remains excluded, but the experience pushes its way through and subtly informs our perceptions. And that’s when we begin to see the game for what it is.

We begin to look beyond it and embrace the concept of spiritual growth, not realising yet that ‘growth’ is nothing more than accepting the knowledge and experience we already have locked away in some deeper part of our consciousness. At this point we find ourselves becoming alienated from the other players, because they’re still wrapped up in the game while we are losing focus. We’re beginning to see the game in a wider context, and maybe we’re even growing tired of playing it. And that’s when the light dims, the noise of the game subsides, and loneliness sets in.

I don’t want to stop playing the game yet; I expect to have further lives. But the time is approaching. I can feel it.

And, as always, I might be completely wrong.