A Captive But Reluctant Audience.

Heifers make a great audience, you know. You can sing to them, dance a little jig, or lecture them on anything from the English Premier League to the meaning of life, and they’ll watch you with rapt attention. Individuals will even jostle for position to get closer to you. If it was a metal gig, the bouncers would be hurling them from the stage.

Until, that is, you reach out to touch them. When you do that, they take a step back.

And so it was with the herd of heifers in the field opposite the copse in Church Lane this evening. The only one brave enough to have her nose tickled was the smallest, skinniest, whitest and prettiest of them. Wasn’t it ever thus?

You can tell why I’m unqualified to be a neo-pagan, can’t you? Too sensible.