Gender Roles.

There was an old BBC radio show called Down Your Way, in which our friendly roving reporter travelled around the country talking to ‘ordinary’ people about their lives and lifestyles. A typical episode would run thus:

‘Good afternoon, everybody. Today I’ve come to Much Gobbling in the Vale to talk to Mrs Fiddlybits who lives near the village green. Good afternoon, Mrs Fiddlybits.’

‘Good afternoon.’

‘And how are you today?’

‘I’m very well, thank you.’

‘Tell me something about yourself. How old are you?’

‘Twenty five.’

‘Are you married?’

‘I am.’

‘How long have you been married?’

‘Three years.’

‘Three years? Quite a veteran, then.’

‘Giggle, giggle.’

‘You’re a housewife, I suppose?’

‘I am, yes.’

‘Quite a skill being a housewife. Tell me what you’re good at.’

‘Cooking.’

‘Do you enjoy cooking?’

‘Oh yes, very much.’

‘And what are you good at cooking?’

‘Bacon, boiled potatoes, erm… toast. I make very good toast.’

‘Ha, ha. I’ll bet you do! Making good toast is a greatly underrated skill.’

‘Is it?’

‘Well, sort of… What else are you good at?’

‘Erm… flower arranging… erm… making jam… erm, erm…’

‘Well, that sounds like a pretty good range of skills to me. Do you have any children?’

‘I do.’

‘How many?’

‘Twenty three.’

‘You have twenty three children?’

‘I do.’

‘Well now, forgive me being personal Mrs Fiddlybits, but it sounds to me as though you must be rather good at something else.’

‘Does it?’

‘Well, yes.’

‘Like what?’

‘Well… you know… making babies?’

‘Oh, I don’t make them.’

‘You don’t?’

‘No. Mr Fiddlybits brings them home from work.’

‘Oh. What does he do?’

‘He’s a milkman.’

‘A milkman?’

‘Yes. He works night shifts, you see. Well, the other men don’t like doing night shifts, so Mr Fiddlybits does all of them. He’s a very kind man.’

‘Oh, right. So where does he get the babies from?’

‘They’re strays.’

‘Strays?’

‘Yes. He finds them crawling around the garden at dead of night, looking for something to eat, so he brings them home. Like I said, he’s very kind.’

‘Indeed… Tell me, Mrs Fiddlybits, do you and your husband sleep in the same bed?’

‘Of course. Him in the day and me at night.’

You see, this is what I’ve been saying for ages. They just don’t make women like they used to do.