I think it’s time to stop the twilight walks, since they’re
starting to encourage a regular sense of melancholy. In trying to identify the
cause I keep coming back to that sense of falling energies, a subject about
which I’ve already waxed ineloquent. I never really noticed it when I lived in
the town, but the countryside has a way of drawing you into more natural cycles
and imperatives, forcing you not only to acknowledge them, but to feel them as
well. And while the solstices bring an imperceptible switch of polarity, the
equinoxes are the time of palpable transition.
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What is the melancholy about exactly? And do you feel this way around the Vernal equinox? I also start shifting my feelings when it starts to become Fall, even though it's my favorite season. Longer nights?
I suppose the core of it is a sense of losing something, even though I know the whole system is cyclical. It's about seeing things that once had life dying away, even though I know the essence remains. I suppose, therefore, it's a form of low level grief. And the fact that it's turning colder and darker doesn't help. Oddly, I'm usually over it by October, and the Vernal equinox has the opposite effect.
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