The German Who Came and Went.

I’m currently engaged in defending the German language against undue vilification on YouTube. It’s a bit of a strange occupation – especially since I don’t speak German – but there you are. Life is nothing if not strange. It had me wondering whether I’ve ever met a German, and I can think of only one.

Back in my photographing days, when I routinely travelled all over the country staying in youth hostels, I met lots of foreigners. There were Aussies aplenty, and Americans, Canadians and New Zealanders. Most of the European foreigners were either French or Dutch, but there was one German woman.

I was staying overnight at a youth hostel in Pembrokeshire. It was February and quite cold. There was a gale force wind coming off the sea and the hostel was perched on top of a cliff. It was also very draughty, and the only heating was a sparsely endowed coal fire at the end of a long room. The German lady and I – we were the only two guests that night – sat huddled up close to the meagre fire and talked until late. And then we went to bed (in separate rooms – she had big hands and an intimidating manner…)

That’s the bit I remember most. (No, not the hands and manner, the going to bed.) There was no heating in the bathroom, no hot water in the bathroom, and no heating in the dorm. (I can only speak for the men’s, of course. You’d have to ask the German lady about the women’s.) It was one of those nights when you stay fully dressed, grab as many blankets as you can from the unoccupied beds, and try to go to sleep. I managed it eventually, and in the morning the German lady had disappeared.

And that’s it: my one and only encounter with a German person. What a narrow life I’ve led.

Back to YouTube now to see whether I’ve been hailed on with bananas.