Weaknesses.

My weaknesses are manifold. It seems that whenever I overcome one, another takes its place. Certain ones abide, however; and although nothing is permanent, certain things are at least persistent and perhaps perennial. One such weakness is the inability to share.

This doesn’t apply to everything. I’m quite good at sharing most things, but two notable exceptions resist all attempts at exorcism. I have never been able to share either my lovers or my living space.

 

Lovers are no longer a problem of course; those days are over. Any notions I might have in that direction are at best mildly fanciful, and at worst uncomfortably delusional. Nobody worth having would want me any more. Too many of the current bag of weaknesses would prove prohibitive.

 

The problem of sharing my living space is, however, becoming stronger. And that might cause me some difficulty a little way down the line.

 

It doesn’t depress me; it just jars a little sometimes. And, at a more general level, I’m content in the understanding that frailty is an essential part of the human condition. How would we grow otherwise? But I sometimes find it unacceptable that certain frailties are too strong for the growth imperative to deal with. I feel frustrated that some fires will ever defy my wish to extinguish them.

 

I intend to lighten up after lunch.