Wednesday 29 August 2018

On Hermione and Consequences.

I’m currently watching the complete series of Harry Potter movies again. I shouldn’t, you know; I really shouldn’t. But let me say no more on the matter. I refuse absolutely to talk of Hermione Grainger, for to do so would leave my reputation in tatters, crushed by the weight of cruel misconstruction. Ms Hermione Grainger is sacrosanct and will not be talked about. And so, to move on…

I saw the-person-who-doesn’t-live-here-any-more’s car again today. It might be recalled that such sightings have become a notable and mildly mysterious feature of my mundane life lately, but today it presented a different face. It was dirty.

Now, to understand the significance of this seemingly insignificant fact, you need first to understand that the-person-who-doesn’t-live-here-any-more’s car is one of the world’s shining things (much like the-person-who-doesn’t-live-here-any-more, which may or may not be coincidental.) Its predecessor wasn’t always so blessed; I’ve known times when its predecessor looked very much as though it were making a triumphant and excessively mud-spattered return from the Paris to Dakar rally – it having been decked out in the renowned British racing green livery an’ all – but the latest steed of Germanic origin is a more refined creature. It shines as if by magic, settled to its more mature role in a changing world. And so to see it dirty was a shock. Maybe it was camouflaged to protect it from the prying eyes of ne’er-do-wells like yours truly. Or maybe I’m presuming an improbable significance. I think I probably am.

I’m in a strange mood tonight. Intriguing creatures lurk deep inside somewhere: fabled and fantastical creatures, shifting and shimmying, calling in ancient voices to stir the blood of fervent and fertile imagination. I can’t ignore them, and why should I?

And they’re not quite as strange as the man who stared at me with dark eyes filled with malevolent intent while I waited in the queue for the kiosk in the Co-op today. Or maybe his stare was more maniacal than malevolent. Yes, I do believe it to be so. A swift perusal of his body language and general demeanour led me to believe that he was a little removed from the normal avenues of perception within which most of us function. He was accompanied by an old lady, and he was greedily consuming some pastry comestible which I assumed had not yet been paid for.

I’m old enough to know the type; I’ve encountered them before; I know that those so afflicted can turn on a whim and do dire things because consequences are of no consequence to them. And so I declined to return the stare, but stood my ground with an air of studied nonchalance. I got away with it. I might not always be so lucky.  (And all I wanted was a bottle of milk.)

All this from watching a Harry Potter movie… I shouldn’t do it, you know; I really shouldn’t. Is my reputation safe, I wonder?

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