Here’s a picture of me doing-mean-with-twig. Clearly I was the person for whom German Expressionist cinema was invented. You only have to look at the non-conformist attitude suggested by the untied shoe laces, and the hand brush lurking menacingly on the top step, all ready to sweep the world clean in preparation for a darker future. And what about the twig, eh? What about that? The steps are the clincher, of course. Steps feature prominently in German Expressionist cinema, and I often dream about steps when I’m anxious about something. Steps were the means by which Nosferatu came to Jonathon Harker’s bedroom in order to prepare him for his own darker future. Frightening, isn’t it?