Saturday 27 September 2014

Patches and Put-Downs.

I’ve suddenly gone into a Shostakovich phase on YouTube. I must be hitting a little Russian patch.

I’ve always been prone to little patches, you know. For most of my adult life I’ve been given to occasional little Gallic patches, and about twenty years ago I went through quite an extended Indian patch. These days it’s more likely to be little American patches and little Chinese patches. Anyway, back to Shostakovich.

I have a remote family connection with him. My ex-wife had a great aunt called Ethel Voynitch who wrote a novel called The Gadfly, and when it was made into a film, Shostakovich wrote the music.  I liked to think of him as a sort of cool uncle by association and marriage, three times removed. But I’m not married to Ethel Voynitch’s great niece any more, and Shostakovich is dead anyway, so I’m not really sure why I mentioned it. But to go off at a tangent…

I once heard a young woman refer to an older man as ‘my cool uncle.’ Clearly, cool uncles are not to be confused with familial uncles, and that’s where my objection lies. When a young woman calls somebody ‘my cool uncle,’ it’s a bit like saying ‘In view of your advanced age and relative physical infirmity, your role in my life can be to serve the drinks and tend the fire while I give the Keys of the Kingdom to somebody else.’ What kind of a put-down is that?

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