On Darkness and Dobby.

Instead of writing meaningless blog posts tonight, I decided to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part1. It wasn’t easy. Much of the film was so dark that I spent large swathes of it looking at a black screen, wondering who the hell was talking and how I was supposed to know what was going on. And I wonder whether anybody who has seen the film could enlighten me with regard to a couple of mysteries concerning an elf called Dobby.

1. Why was Dobby standing up to his ankles (at least, I think they were his ankles; he had very strange legs) in the sea, dying? What was he dying of?

2. Considering the fact that our intrepid heroes have just been transported to a wild and windswept beach somewhere on the edge of the known universe, where did Harry find the spade to dig a hole in which to deposit the said dead Dobby?

3. Who the hell wrote Dobby anyway? He was awful. It wouldn’t have been quite so bad had he simply been nauseatingly sycophantic, but he wasn’t even convincingly so. Wherever Harry found the spade, I’m glad he did.

Yes, I know Dobby just saved Harry’s life, but that didn’t make any sense either. I don’t think I’m quite up to Harry Potter films.