Pretentiously Precocious.

The beer I’m drinking at the moment is Morland’s Old Speckled Hen. The label on the rim of the bottle summarises its qualities as ‘Abundance of malts and distinctive toffee character.’ Don’t they talk tosh? It tastes of beer and it’s quite strong at 5%ABV, which is perfectly good enough.

At least it doesn’t say ‘A precocious little beer which delights in tantalising the palate whilst maintaining a coy exterior’ (which it probably would if it was French) but still…