Thursday 17 October 2013

The Problem with Hanging Balls.

I was in the DIY store today and saw some hanging balls for sale at £15.99. They were about 12” in diameter and made of green plastic leaves. I asked myself:

'Why would anybody spend £15.99 on a 12” diameter hanging ball made of green plastic leaves? There’s no art in them, no craft in them, little of aesthetic value since they’re not even real leaves, and no practical value at all.'

Because they’re there. Because people want something to spend money on, because we’ve come to the point where the main focus of life is acquiring things you haven’t already got, however artless, craftless or pointless they are.

If these things didn’t exist, would you encounter groups of people hanging dejectedly around street corners saying ‘Oh dear, I do wish somebody would invent a hanging ball, about 12” in diameter, made of green plastic leaves. I’ve always wanted one of those. Life just isn’t the same without them.’

No. But they still buy them because they’re there, and because buying things is what you do. I wonder how far this can go before people wake up and say ‘But actually, I have no use for a hanging ball made of green plastic leaves, so what’s the point in buying one?’

The problem is that the world is awash with green plastic hanging balls. Shop windows everywhere – especially in shopping malls – are full of things that are artless, craftless and utterly pointless. But if everybody stopped buying them, the economy would collapse, and then we would have to go back to a simpler way of living, crying into our home made soup until we got used to it again.

I’m unusually tired tonight. I think somebody waved goodbye to me at 0436 their time this morning. That’s never happened before.

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