(That joke is usually applied to the northern English, but
being foreign must be even worse.)
Seriously, though. Those not familiar with the dotty little nuances
of British culture might be interested to know that the same surname is
pronounced differently depending on whether you’re posh or not. My landlord,
for example, is called Clowes, and being a member of the landed gentry and
listed in Debrett’s, he pronounces it as in ‘shoes.’ Over in my neck of the
woods, being an industrial town without either a member of the landed gentry or
a copy of Debrett’s to its name, it’s pronounced as in ‘cows.’
It’s the same with Rowlett – pronounced as in ‘toe’ if you’re
posh, as in ‘plough’ if you’re a pleb.
Stoughton
– same as Rowlett.
Dalton
– as in ‘doll’ if you’re one of the refined breed, as in ‘wall’ if you’re the
one tugging your forelock. (I have a personal interest in that one, but I daren’t
say why.)
Posh people called Beauchamp and Belvoir pronounce them Beecham
and Beaver respectively. Fortunately, there aren’t any non-posh Beauchamps and
Belvoirs, so that’s OK.
And did you know that the people at Debrett’s, bless their elitist little socks, are in a state of near-apoplexy over falling standards in
modern life? I gather they’re now running courses for coarse young British
people to teach them how best to appear proper (love that word) in job interviews.
The idea came to them, apparently, as a result of their management being
outraged by falling standards of etiquette among their junior staff. If you
didn’t feel so sorry for poor old Debrett’s, you’d be laughing your non-elitist
little socks off, wouldn’t you?
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