Thursday, 14 April 2016

An Antipodean Muse.

One of my stats trackers informs me that a person or persons unknown from Victoria, Australia, read one of my old blog posts at 7.22am local time on his or her iPhone. It's an insignificant bit of trivia, but when the mind is starved of inspiration, insignificance is no bar to a little idle speculation.

Being a bit of a whizz on world geography, I happen to know that Australia is in the southern hemisphere, so I'm aware that their seasons are back to front. That means it’s autumn Down Under. I go further and remember that an erstwhile correspond from that fair continent once informed me that Victoria prides itself on being the upmarket state, so a picture begins to take form.

I imagine my visitor to be living in an old, villa-style house – a remnant of colonial days probably – and is sitting on his or her balcony in the gentle warmth of an antipodean autumn morning. He or she is taking coffee in the company of some extravagant plant with luxuriant foliage which compliments the filigree design of the wrought iron balustrade perfectly. Together they are shaded from the glare of the morning sun by the leaves of an old beech tree, planted long ago by a Victorian (assume whichever definition you prefer) colonial officer who, on finding himself unable to be in England now that April’s here, chose to plant a reminder of the Old Country so that he could at least bask in its golden radiance when dear April was forced to wear the garb of an incongruous season. Lying on the table is a half finished crossword in whichever newspaper presumes to be the Australian equivalent of The Times. And so it goes on…

I expect I’m completely wrong, but I do wonder whether some person in Victoria, Australia is concurrently engaged in a reciprocal muse about the writer of a blog sitting in his house at 10.22pm enjoying the supposed delights of a properly vernal English April. I doubt it, which is why it’s merely idle speculation to fill the gap between the ending of tonight’s DVD and engagement with the diurnal shower routine.

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