Friday 4 November 2016

Thin Pickings.

I went searching one of those cornucopias of useless items that you get stapled into TV listings magazines tonight, looking for something funny to put on the blog. They used to be a brilliant source of amusing material at one time, but they’ve become tedious now. They don’t sell James Bond watches and beautiful plastic plants-that-light-up any more, being almost wholly preoccupied with flannelette leisure wear, comfort shoes, bra extenders and incontinence requisites.

There was a flea comb on offer which electrocutes the little vampires rather than poisoning them, but apart from finding some oblique reference to American forms of capital punishment along the lines of wondering when somebody will invent a flea strangulation device, I couldn’t think of anything to say on the matter

The only item of modest note was a device which purportedly removes ear wax safely. The blurb said:

No need for potentially dangerous cotton buds – this handy Ear Cleaner effectively cleans out wax in a kinder, safer, more hygienic way. Gentle vacuum suction smoothly removes ear wax without pain, damage or irritation.

Sounds good, doesn’t it, but I’m curious to know why sticking a mini vacuum cleaner in your ear is any safer than doing the same thing with a cotton bud.

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