The Hero Heads Home.

Some of you might remember the imperious Frothgar, hero of the Ashbourne Saga. Nigel’s old van, in other words. Well, dear Frothy is due to dip his prow into the frigid waters of the mighty North Sea and head homewards tomorrow. Nigel has sorted out another vehicle for me and the swap has been arranged.

Frothgar is an impassive sort of chap. He’s given no hint whatever as to his feelings on the matter. I assume he’s probably pining for the fjords, but I would never expect a hero to admit to such a thing. Do heroes and blue parrots have common ground, I ask myself. I’m sure I shall never know, but what would legends be without their share of mystery?

His replacement is a rather snazzy, nine-year-old Renault Megane. A red one. This is of some concern to me because it’s rather more upmarket than I’m used to. I fear it might damage my reputation with the locals who mostly sport new Mercedes SUVs as a matter of perceived necessity. They might think I’m moving up in the world - heading in their direction, heaven forbid. I think I might work on enhancing my Mad Gerald image; that should keep them happy. And it wouldn’t be far from the truth, would it?