Saturday 25 February 2017

Who is Jim?

Donald Trump has a friend called Jim who doesn’t go to Paris any more. Or so he says.

When I was a little boy playing cowboys and Indians, the first person to speak was always called Jim because that was the first name we thought of for an American cowboy. There was always a cowboy called Jim, and I’m sure it’s no coincidence that the first captain if the Starship Enterprise was also called Jim. If John Doe is the cultural spirit of America, Jim is the fictional one.

So I wonder whether Donald would give us more information with regard to this Jim character. I mean… like… you know … does he actually exist? Where does he live? What’s his phone number? Can he speak French? Does he know the difference between Appellation Contrôlée and Vin Ordinaire? Would he recognise Gallic chic and be able to distinguish it from the Barbie doll stereotype favoured by redneck Presidents? And so on… All relevant points when considering the mystery of Jim.

And then, of course, there’s another point worth mentioning. It’s questionable whether any self-respecting Parisian would want a friend of Donald Trump visiting their city. I expect they take pollution control quite seriously over there.

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