A Regrettable Trend.

It won’t have gone unnoticed that I haven’t been the happiest bunny in the burrow lately. That’s because things have been going on that have been giving me cause to feel miffed, mortified, miserable, manic or jut plain pissed off (Americans may drop the ‘off’) on an almost daily basis.

Now, I do realise that hearing somebody constantly carp about the same dreary subject gets tedious after a while. As my mother used to say, ‘for God’s sake, change the bloody record.’ Quite, but certain issues have a habit of holding one’s attention for as long as they last, and the same record keeps jumping into your hand whether you like it or not. And, as I explained in an earlier post, my blog largely exists to provide me with a sounding board. Since I rarely talk to a confidant from one week to the next, anything I want to say goes here. And that means you lot get it all. Sorry, but that’s how it is. Love me, love my blog, or words to that effect. So now I’m going to regale the assembled multitude – my blog – with the latest thing that’s making me ratty. Leave now if you don’t want to hear it. Fair enough?

One of my few decent qualities is that I’m a loyal friend to anybody who manages to get that close. And, believe it or not, I was even totally faithful in all my romantic liaisons as long as the relationship retained its integrity. Take it from me, I can be remarkably selfless and supportive in close relationships, and the few of them I form tend to get established quickly. That’s because I’m generally good at weighing people up quickly. Occasionally, however, I get it wrong, and I usually discover the mistakes pretty quickly too. I soon see that I’m being faced with one or more of the few things that cause me to walk away without a second word or backward glance. Here’s the list:

Being teased.

Being toyed with.

Being pushed unceremoniously aside in favour of a perceived better prospect.

Being exploited.

Being manipulated.

Being treated with indifference.

Being treated as an unending source of emotional sustenance without being afforded the benefit of reciprocation. (And no, that isn’t quite the same thing as being taken for granted.)

The list might not be exhaustive, but it will do for now.

I do understand that most of these are simply a matter of pride; and I understand that pride is a manifestation of ego; and I understand that ego is the basis of almost all human weakness. So I have a weakness. I have several. Don’t we all?

I fully expect this to be a passing phase, and that everything will soon be back to normal, whatever ‘normal’ is. That will make it easier to read. I know that some people feel uneasy when faced with what they see as ‘too much information.’ I don’t see why, and I can’t be responsible for their sensibilities anyway. I was made transparent. That’s all there is to it.