Sunday 6 October 2019

From YouTube to the Abyss.

I swear I could make a full time career out of insulting most of the people who write comments on YouTube.

I read them, you know, I do. Lots of them. It’s like sitting on a chair in front of a stage watching a procession of Karl Pilkingtons saying their piece and then asking ‘what did you think of that?’ And I want to tell them, honestly and in well ordered English, precisely what I thought of that. Only I mustn’t because I’m trying to be a better person. And I don’t want to hurt or insult people anyway (apart from the likes of Trump and the other psychopaths running the world who exempt me from the karmic process because they’re not really people in the accepted sense of the word.) Hurting and insulting people is not what you do when you’re trying to be a better person.

So I stay quiet, and I congratulate myself for staying quiet, and then I remonstrate with myself because self-congratulation is yet another form of ego-projection, but I grudgingly accept it because it does at least ameliorate the frustration.

And then I go off onto one of my ‘what’s it all about?’ trips, in which I face the unanswerable question of whether this life is all there is, or whether it’s only a small part of a much larger existence. Because if there’s nothing beyond this pathetically short span of life I see slowly fading in the mirror, it really doesn’t matter a damn what I do. But that’s a recipe for anarchy, and anarchy can be pretty uncomfortable, which is perhaps why humans invented God and religion. Or perhaps they didn’t.

The search goes on. No gurus please.

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