Lugholes.

I’m becoming obsessed with ears. Every time I watch an orchestra in performance on YouTube, it’s the ears of the players I pay most attention to.

It’s probably because I consider ears to be the most imperfectly designed part of the human body (noses come a close second.) Let’s face it, ears are ugly things and were obviously designed by somebody with a jaded sense of humour.

But it’s also because I have good ears. As ears go, mine are about as good as they get. In fact, my ears are the only part of my body I’ve ever been proud of and felt happy to display in public. They have a couple of wrinkles now where they didn’t used to have them, but they still pass muster on dull days and under artificial lighting.