Wednesday, 8 April 2020

A Tear in the Fabric.

Things keep going wrong at the moment – with my body, the technology, my relationships, and the world in general. There’s pain and fatigue and inconvenience and frustration and confusion and a general sense of malaise in the air.

It’s like having a dream in which you find yourself in the familiar surroundings of your home town, only the details are wrong and things are crumbling. The shops and offices and banks and tea rooms and hairdressers are in unfamiliar places. One shop has a door missing, another has a broken window, a third has its sign hanging loose. The statue of the local hero has fallen over and the town hall clock has stopped, while the wind blows dry and fallen leaves along the high street even though there are no trees in sight. And you don’t know why. How did matters come to this, and is there anything you can do about it?

It’s all to be observed, I suppose, as everything always is. But what am I observing exactly? The passage of a troubled time in my life and the ongoing history of the world, or a rent in the illusory nature of what we call reality?

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