Unanswered Questions.

My mind keeps going off to strange places these days. Tonight I found myself sitting in a misty coffee shop where there was a woman at the next table staring at me intensely. I tried to ignore her, of course – because staring back isn’t polite – but her eyes were so compelling that I couldn’t resist taking the odd sneaky glance in her direction.

She continued to stare for some time, and then she stood up and came over to me. ‘You’re right,’ she said. ‘Right about what?’ I enquired, not unreasonably in the circumstances. ‘I’ll tell you that when you’re ready.’ ‘Ready for what?’ ‘To be told what you’re right about, of course.’ And then she walked out of the door and out of my life until I’m ready to hear whatever it is I’m right about. I have my suspicions.

And all this the result of an unfortunate and most irritating experience. I got to 1.49.27 in Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince tonight when the video stopped working and wouldn’t start again for love nor money. Harry and Dumbledore were just about to discover what really went on during Professor What’s-his-name’s meeting with Tom Riddle, and then *pouf* it went.

By that time, however, I had discovered something interesting. Seems Hermione Grainger is saddled with my demon’s kid brother, poor girl. (Or maybe it’s his sister, which is probably more likely.) You don’t know what I’m talking about, do you? I’ll tell you if and when I decide you’re ready to hear it.

*  *  *

Meanwhile, I did a three hour hedge-trimming job in the garden today. Present indications are that I’ve survived, but I’m still being troubled by a question that’s been pestering me for some time: How do you know when you’re dead? Does some misty, floaty spirit come drifting into your sight line and say:

‘Excuse me, I thought you ought to know that you just died.’

Did I?

‘You did.’

How did that happen?

‘Don’t you remember?

No.

‘OK, I’ll explain it to you when I decide you’re ready to hear it. For now, follow me and I’ll see whether there’s any porridge left.’