Chinese Women Rule.

I’m coming to the conclusion that, for all its pretension to the contrary, Chinese culture is secretly matriarchal. You only have to watch clips from their movies to see that Chinese men have only two modes: fierce and simpering. The women, on the other hand, can do pretty, cute, scolded puppy dog, sagacious, determined, don’t-mess-with-me, you-asked-for-it, sensual, and supremely disinterested. On top of that, they can run up walls and fly without batting an eyelid (although, coincidentally, they are also the world’s best at batting eyelids.)

I reckon this is why the Americans are siding with everybody else in South East Asia and claiming that the Chinese are de-stabilising the South China Sea. It’s all the Lady Gagas in government. They’re turning a greener shade of pea.

Ms Wong had a moan at me tonight. She’s Chinese, you know.