Seeing the Whole Jigsaw.

At times today the combination of personal woes, world affairs, and the darkness inherent in the human condition produced such a level of intense desperation that all I wanted to do was go to sleep and not wake up again.

I tried to take refuge in the notion that I’m not here to connect, and maybe not even to contribute, but only to observe. I tried to take the Buddhist view that observation must be non-judgemental. I reprised an earlier position of mine that we’re all fundamentally alone, and that our ultimate responsibility is only to our own spiritual evolution.

And then I read several news reports from Afghanistan and my empathic side was brought to its knees with sadness and impotence.

I heard somebody say recently that coming into this life is like being given only a few pieces of a 500 piece jigsaw, and then being expected to know what the whole picture represents. So who will tell me?

Certainly not the diehard atheists; they’re just taking the easy option. Certainly not the religionists; they have too much of the scent of delusion and dependency about them. Certainly not the people who run the world; they’re too driven by ego and the pursuit of self-interest. But I’ve said all this before and the mystery of the finished picture remains elusive.

Maybe one of these days the personal woes will magically disappear, world affairs will take on an optimistic note, and the good people will come to the fore at last. And if I spot a flock of pigs flying westward into the sunset, I might take a break from the jigsaw and start to re-engage with writing silly ditties, flights of amused imagination, and tongue-in-cheek observations of things that don’t matter. Until the next life.