I’ve been here before, several times over the blogging
years. The blogging years have been troubled ones in the life of JJ. During
that time, my soul – if such I possess – has probably grown quite a lot (which
might or might not be important), but my spirit has been oft on the ropes and
fighting to stay upright. You might recall that back in June I remarked that my
life was about to change and probably not for the better. So it proved to be,
and this time the poor old spirit was dealt a blow which sent it to the canvas.
It kneels there still, trying to find the breath and strength to get up and
carry on.
The result is a strange kind of torpidity with which I’m
unfamiliar. I still care greatly about certain things, but mostly I try not to
give a damn about the cocktail of troubles and worrying prospects.
Unfortunately, the old urge to write and communicate has become a casualty of
this torpid state and is laid low. Today’s rare encounter, however, was
sufficient to pump a little energy back into the patient, and that’s why I’m
offering this explanation.
Whether there will be more to come, I don’t know yet. Sometimes the
spirit is capable of raising itself without assistance from the mind so time
will tell. Present issues persist and there are more storms on the horizon, and
all I feel able to do is go with whatever flow comes my way. Maybe I’m morphing
into a Taoist.
5 comments:
About time! I've been scouring the obituaries. Please check in a bit more regularly.
Well, I did expect that a few people might wonder where I’d disappeared to, but I didn’t expect anybody to care very much. Why would they? They’re nearly all distant people in distant lands. They probably even have lives to occupy them.
As for an obituary, no chance. To get one of those these days you have to be either someone of perceived significance or die in extraordinary circumstances. In the latter case, some semi-literate relative will be sought out to mumble a few predictable platitudes about how the deceased was the life and soul of the party, generous to a fault, loved by everybody, etc, etc, most of which won’t even be true, and the whole thing will be colourfully augmented by further equally predictable platitudes invented by some equally semi-literate journalist because the one thing that qualifies us to receive unequivocal praise – whether it be true or not – is having achieved the state of being dead.
But thanks for the concern. It’s appreciated.
And maybe I should annotate my wall calendar on the 1st of every month with ‘note the blog to the effect that you are still breathing and still capable of saying so.’ I could even get a rubber stamp made to relieve me of the mental and physical energy required to write it.
Atleast know I will miss you wherever you will be.My belief is that there is only life after life after life.If ever that be true,I would very much so love if you scribbled 'JJ' on my mirror.Chance made us cross paths and am glad it did, u taught me something that will stay with me forever. I know u find it hard to call anyone your friend but for me you will always be 'my friend JJ'.
Thank you so much for the comment, Caroline. It was a welcome gift and warmly received.
The mirror request was interesting. Whenever the train arrives to take me to the terminus I’ll bear it in mind. I doubt that ghosts are very good at writing on mirrors, but you never know. But if it’s allowed, I’ll put you on the small list of people to visit, albeit invisibly (I expect ghosts have ways of finding out where people live.) In any event, I expect there’s still a bit of life left in me yet.
Hope you and the boys are getting through the pandemic without too much difficulty.
Thanks for asking JJ,the boys and I are doing fine, it's tough for most people but I doubt the pandemic will last another year without a cure,atleast I hope.
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