1) They want ‘snow wardens’ to spread grit on the untreated
lanes of The Shire during icy weather, but they don’t say how the spreading is
to be done. I have my doubts.
2) There’s to be a Live Irish Music Night at the village pub
this Friday, but I already knew about that and decided I shouldn’t attend. Few
things are closer to my heart than Irish music, but there are impediments. For
a start, I might have to rub shoulders with somebody who isn’t my best friend
at the moment (and it isn’t who you might think it is.) Secondly, ever since
the onset of the dreaded CFS, drinking alcohol before midnight sends me a bit
lopsided, and the prospect of listening to live Irish music without a pint of
Guinness would be unconscionably sacrilegious.
3) If anybody asks me whether I’ll be attending the ‘Age UK
Roadshow,’ I might well drive my car over their feet at the first opportunity. ‘Wellness
Shop with Lisa,’ on the other hand, sounds well good for a giggle. As it
happens, however, they’re both Women’s Institute events, and I doubt they allow
men into those. Not unless, that is, you happen to be a rare male of the
species who can make jam and sing Jerusalem in a
falsetto voice at the same time.
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